Monday, January 24, 2011

Off to a bad start

Just got an email from the director of the short film that I've been auditioning for, and I didn't get the part. I got call back twice, so I believe that they really liked me and after my last call back I actually took the train with the director and we ended up chatting and had tons in common and got on really well, so I don't doubt that we'll work together in the future in some capacity... but I'm still disappointed, of course. I thought the script she's written is really awesome, really funny and honest and original, and I think she's going to make an awesome film out of it and I really wanted to be part of it.

And now I have to go to Kungens Kurva and work all day at this store selling bits of wood and screws and other things I'm completely unfamiliar with, dealing with customers that are mostly rude and in a hurry... and I really need the money, which is something I've been telling myself since this morning when I went to bed, kept telling myself as I was trying to go to sleep and reminded myself thoroughly as the alarm went off a few hours later and told me to drag my arse to the shower. So I did. And I made myself a cup of coffee. And I had just enough time to sit down at my computer for a while before getting ready to leave, so I'm not stressed or anything, and it's not like last time I worked in that place when I had to start at a quarter to six, which meant I had to get up at three to catch the last night bus in order to get there, which meant I never went to bed... this time I'm on at eleven, and now is a perfectly reasonable to be up, and I'm not even that tired to be honest... I just really don't want to go work there, and I really have to. And that is a combination that makes me really not want to even more.

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