fire, water, burn (hey that's a song...)

he kissed me under the water. in the pool. i know i shouldn't play his game. (or is it mine?) but once you've been burned you can't stop playing with fire... well, not if you're me, anyway...

i broke up withmy boyfriend this evening. now i'm at a friend's place. we got drunk on red wine(shiraz) and he passed out on the pull-out and i'm here. i won't be able to sleep. i feel... i don't know, i was feeling awful, like i was evil reincarnate but now i'm just numb (it's probably the wine)

so i'm on the verge on a nervous breakdown and my social life etc are starting to suffer from it, but i'm just going to try and ride this one out for as long as i can and either it'll pass before christmas or if it doesn't i'll be going back home to sweden over christmas hols and if that doesn't give my fucked up head and chest the space i think they need, then i don't know what it'll take...

i'm at a couple of friends' place right now, crashed here last night after the party and early morning coffee with another friend, we were going to go swimming in the pool but then realized that it was three o'clock and the pool closes at midnight, so we postponed it til this afternoon.

pointless; i am going insane.

We were supposed to read a book called "Mastery" for voice class with Ian and it's left me quite conflicted and i think i might be on the verge of a nervous breakdown. But a huge mug of coffee has been brought to my attention and a pack of cigarettes are awaiting me on the porch, so I will have to make this a (very lame) cliffhanger and return to the subject at another juncture further ahead in time, i.e. too be continued...

a happy new life

so i'm back again.

i'm living in vancouver now and have done so since new year's eve 2006/2007. i am an acting student at vancouver film school and loving every moment of it. it's as though i've come home, at last.

i worry about the future though. i really want to stay here after graduation.